Adam’s Helper

The Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.

Genesis 2:18

I came across an article yesterday talking about how same-sex marriage takes away from the uniqueness of gender and blurs the lines of who God created us to be.  I thought the article was intriguing because I’ve never heard the argument against same-sex marriage presented in such a way.  But beyond being intrigued by it, I found myself questioning whether or not my role as a woman is being fulfilled how God intended it to be fulfilled.

Maybe I should back up, though, and give you another reason why this article impacted me in a way that brought conviction to my heart.  A few days ago my husband and I were having a conversation about just this topic (roles, not same-sex marriage).  My personality leaves me wanting to control and plan and organize every detail of our family life.  My husband’s personality leaves him willing to let me run the show.  So, we got to talking about how that’s not how God intended us to be.  He’s to be the leader of our family and I’m to be the submissive helper who is here to aid him as he directs our family.  Of course, to effectively lead our family he must be under submission to God and His leading.  It really is a beautifully unique design of order if you really sit and ponder it.

So, back to the article and how it affected me….

I’m not sure when it happened but somewhere along the line, women stopped striving to be what God created us to be.  I’m sure it had something to do with Women’s Rights and all the “I am woman, hear me roar” feminist stuff.  And don’t get me wrong, I whole-heartedly believe in equal rights.  Every human on this planet is created with exactly the same value.  God values each and every one of us and we should treat each of His creations with the same level of love and respect.

However, just because we were all created with the same amount of value does not mean we were created to contribute to this world in the same way.  So, what does that mean for us, the Christian Housewives of the world?  Well, here are a few things it can mean for us…

Let your husband lead.

Encourage your husband to take charge.  Don’t criticize him when he does.  Don’t ridicule him when he fails.  Support him, encourage him, believe in him, and pray for him.  Find areas in your marriage and family life where you have control when maybe you shouldn’t and ask God to help you relinquish that control so both you and your husband can fulfill the roles God created you for.

Wives, in the same way submit yourselves to your own husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives, when they see the purity and reverence of your lives.  I Peter 3:1,2

Work on having a quiet and meek spirit.

We live in a society now where women aspire to be confident, loud, opinionated, and bold.  But God has called us to restrain ourselves and let the beauty within be the beauty that others see.  Our countenance should speak louder than anything coming out of our mouths.

 Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight. For this is the way the holy women of the past who put their hope in God used to adorn themselves. They submitted themselves to their own husbands, like Sarah, who obeyed Abraham and called him her lord. You are her daughters if you do what is right and do not give way to fear.  I Peter 3:3-6

Study the Proverbs 31 woman.

God dedicated a whole section of the Bible speaking specifically to US!  We should be studying that passage, meditating on it, memorizing it, and living it.  He’s given us all we need to learn how to be who He wants us to be.

A wife of noble character who can find?
She is worth far more than rubies.  Proverbs 31:10

So, my dear fellow Christian Housewives, today I encourage you to embrace the delicate, sensitive creature you were created to be.  God doesn’t want us to be something we’re not.  We need to do our part to not blur the lines that he created when he made man and woman.  We are unique creatures made for a specific purpose.  So today, let’s get back to the purpose we were created for.

I am woman…don’t hear me roar, watch me love. 

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4 thoughts on “Adam’s Helper”

  1. This is a great article. Thank you. It’s s great way to start my day as a wife and mother. A couple of weeks ago, on a popular Christian program, I heard the host refer to Proverbs 31, which I had read several times before. She referred to the part: she worketh willingly with her hands, and makes linens and sells them, and likened that to the modern working woman and “see it’s okay that woman work outside of the house for a pay.” This bothered me after I heard it because I think God wants us to be fully dedicated to Him, our husbands, and our children before anything else. Just wanted to get your opinion on that.

    1. Kelly, thanks for the comment…I always LOVE hearing feedback from my readers. Your comment got me thinking about where exactly my convictions are regarding working outside of the home. I’ll do my best to summarize in a comment, but I’m thinking this may be a good topic for a post in the future.

      In a nutshell here’s what I think:
      – A woman is much more effective in her role as wife/mother/homemaker staying at home rather than working IF she has the convictions to follow through with her daily responsibilities in such a way that builds up her family and glorifies God. (Example: a wife who is lazy, self-indulgent, doesn’t raise her children properly etc. will not be fulfilling her God-intended role simply by being at home.) This is NOT to say that a wife/mother should work simply because she doesn’t manage her home in a proper way. Rather it’s saying that the role of homemaker is only successful when you open your heart to God’s wisdom and learn to sacrifice for the sake of family.
      – Sometimes it is financially impossible for a woman to stay home with her children and when working is a necessity, I don’t believe God will judge her for that.
      – I believe a woman should learn to be happy, content, and fulfilled staying at home taking on the responsibilites of homemaker. If she isn’t then I then I think it’s an area where growth can/should happen. That’s not saying it will always be easy or joyful staying at home (because we all know there are times we want to run away), but there does come a point where you can look at what your family is gaining from your sacrifice and you can find joy in that rather than your current circumstance.

      There’s a lot more that I’d like to say regarding this topic so I’m thinking I’ll jot down some notes, ponder this a little more, pray a lot, read what the Bible has to say, and write a post about it.

      I know I have many readers (some who are family and friends) who work outside the home. I just want to say I don’t judge them for that. Each woman is responsible for her own choices before God and it’s not my place to tell them what’s right or wrong (unless the Bible clearly says it’s right/wrong). That’s between them and God. I do, however, have my opinions as to why God created us to be the submissive helper and how I think that relates to our culture and society today. So, stay tuned if you’d like to continue the topic!

  2. Love this! My sentiments exactly! Curious if you ever posted regarding the above comment on women working outside the home? If so, where can I find it cause I would love to read it!

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